Is this a mistake?

[cutlass5268]

Not sure where to start without making this too long of a question. The main question I have is, have I made a mistake letting my baby girl up on my shoulder?
I have let her on my shoulder a few times now. Twice I had no choice because she decided to test her flight skills and the only way I could get her back on her cage, was to let her climb me up onto my shoulder. She won't step up for me yet. She also has started to like sneaking onto the back of the couch and coming over and hopping on my shoulder if I am sitting down. So far I've just walked around the house a bit to show her the other rooms and the basement. When she starts to get goofy, that's my cue to return her to her cage.
Last night we had a scare because she decided to fly across the living room and crash landed on the second last step in our entryway. I was just getting home as it happened, so I'm not sure if she was trying to follow my wife, or if she got startled by something and just flew straight out from her cage. I suspect it was the startled scenario. So when I walked through the door, there she was standing there to greet me. Thank god she wasn't hurt. So of course she wouldn't step up for me, she just went charging up me and onto my shoulder. I didn't mind though, I just wanted to comfort her and make sure she was ok. Which she was, because she startled babbling and woo hooing for me as soon as she got up there. I let her stay on my shoulder for about 20 minutes. Once she calmed down, she made herself right at home and snuggled against my ear while watching my three wives (one wife, two daughters = three wives!). Sorry for the long story, I just want to make sure I don't start any bad habits even though I love having her snuggling and nibbling on my ear.
Thanks,
Dave.

ps. She also has some weird fixation for my wife's hair. My wife, who never pays much attention to Avy, (so she says) was freaked out last week. She was sitting on the couch and Avy decided to join her. My wife is still quite scared of her and Avy walked right over to her and was eyeballing her spiky hair. Then she checked it out for taste a few times and was standing with one foot on the back of the couch and one foot on my wife's head. I almost fell of the chair laughing. My wife is now known as nest head in the household!!!:laugh:<br><br>Post edited by: cutlass5268, at: 2009/11/19 23:26

[Talon]

I Let all my birds on my shoulders most of the time, but only if they behave. I have for the last 4 years. But certainly I wouldn't allow it until they stepped up. If you don't assert your authority by first getting your bird to step up, she will feel superior to you by being on your shoulder only.
I recently bought an amazon who didn't know how to step up, and I am just starting to allow her on my shoulder a few times as she is mastering step up.

As for your wife's hair. Birds love to preen your hair! Take it as a complement!

[danmcq]

I am of the same opinion and terms with my Parrots as Talon.

Just make sure earrings are removed before allowing the bird up there or you will have them ripped from your ear. inch:

As long as you bird behaves up there, no problem.

Step-ups are the first basic command your bird needs to get down. :-)

[judygram]

I too allow my birds on my shoulder but they both step up for me no problem, don't even have to ask, just put my hand in front of them and they know what I want. You need to "allow" your grey on your shoulder and not just let her get away with it because she has the upper hand.

[JillyBeanz]

I read all about the "teach your parrot the no shoulder policy, it'll think it's better than you" - "advice". I tried this for the first day or two (because everywhere told me this is what I MUST do). What a load of tosh!

Harvey is quite happy sitting on my shoulder, helping me on the forum, helping me wash the dishes etc. He's happy there and I am happy - I trust him - he has never tried to bite and at the first sign he would be stopped.

Harvey's like Judy's birds - doesn't need to be asked to step up, sees my hand and knows what is asked of him - keep up the good work

[cutlass5268]

Thanks for the info and insights. I've read all of the other posts about the shoulders thing and realize that is more about trust and personal preference than anything. I do trust her on my shoulder, and she is good about getting off when she's had enough, which usually isn't long. Now that I'm a little more educated, I know I haven't received a bite that wasn't my own doing!! Last night was a bit of an exception because she was scared. But when she was ready, she hopped right back on her cage when I took her to it. The first couple of tries she wasn't ready yet, and I didn't mind having her there (although I do have to wash my shirt, she's not that well behaved yet!). My main concern was letting her up there before she trusts me enough to step up for me. I have to admit, I'm usually the sucker who is offering the shoulder to her

[casper]

I allow two of my birds on my shoulder, one I dont trust as he gets nippy and will go to bite ears etc.
Its all about reading body language again, what mood the bird is in.Shoulders are acceptable but bites can and will happen.
I once took a nasty bike to the cheek off one of my babies which was totally unexpected. Just make sure your baby girl is trained to be removed from your shoulder if you need to.

[cutlass5268]

Had the same flying problem again yesterday when I got home. Avy was out of her cage walking around on the couch and when I got to the top of the stairs, she suddenly decided to take flight. Not sure if she was trying to fly to me or what. She wasn't startled by anything and I was talking to her as soon as I came through the door. She crashed right in to the wall. She wasn't hurt as far I could tell. She was fine after she calmed down and stopped shaking. I'm going to have to stop allowing the wife and girls from allowing her out of her cage when I'm not there I guess. I hate to do that, but I'm worried she's going to get hurt. How do other people with flighted birds let them fly around the house without having them crash in to things??

On another note, I decided to accelerate my plans on getting her a new, bigger cage. I was going to wait until I could afford it, but the cage that she came with is much too small to meet her needs. I can't stand to think of her being in that cage any longer. Worst thing is, cages in Canada are not cheap, so I'm going to have to shell out about $1,000.00 for a decent sized cage. :blink:

[luvparrots]

I personally do not allow my grey on my shoulder. This is my personal preference and because from day one she has not been allowed there she never tries now. Unfortunately now that she can fly she wants to land on on my head!!!!!:blink: We are working on that.....:unsure:

[Spinner]

There is no way that I want my greys on my shoulder as a routine perching spot. Whether on a shoulder or back of the couch, it remains that if the bird's eyes are above yours, it will become the alpha (or think it is) over time.

My opinion....but you asked - yes, I think it's a mistake.

...but there are always exceptions where it's necessary, as in your latest event.